Jill Boultinghouse, MFT Therapist and Counselor

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3 Myths About Bullying

3 Myths About Bullying

After years of working in junior high and high schools as a school counselor, I learned a few things about bullies and their victims.  Bullying is a deliberate and repetitive act of aggression against someone of lesser power.  Bullies shop for victims, meaning that the victim is picked because he/she is vulnerable.  Bullies get what they want in the short term, but often lose in the long term. Here are some common myths about bullying:

1.  Bullies seek power because they feel powerless. Not true.  Bullies have one goal- get what they want.  And what is sad is that it often works.  Many children experiment with control and power plays early on, but terminate this behavior by the teen years.

2.  The best way to manage a bully is to fight back.  Not true.  Physical confrontation is a weaker position.   A better tactic is a position of social assertion, such as walking away.

3.  Bullies outgrow bullying.  In some cases this is true, but bullies are at high risk in adulthood of dating aggression, sexually harassing peers and bullying in other social interactions in adulthood.

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